Why Do I Always Choose The Wrong Person?

One of the most interesting relationship questions that I’ve ever been asked is, “Why do I always pick the wrong person?” It is usually accompanied by this question, “How do I stop picking the wrong person?” While there are many answers to these questions I think one of the most important one is the fact that knowledge of oneself must take precedence to entering into a relationship with someone else. What I mean is that you have to choose to know yourself first. Doing so will arm you with the information necessary for making wise choices when it comes to being romantically linked. For example: What are your likes, dislikes, ambitions in life, traditions and personal beliefs? How did you grow up? Did you have a large family with gatherings or no family at all? What have been the experiences that have shaped your life? Are there things that you don’t mind settling for? What about behaviors that you will not tolerate? Are you very passionate, talkative, quiet, adventurous, withdrawn or fun loving? How important are these things to you?  These are things you need to know. I have only listed a few of them, but it is by knowing some of these things that you will have what you need to form a set of solid expectations, requirements and boundaries for a relationship with someone else. Please understand that these determinations need to be made BEFORE you are faced with a moment of decision. That way you won’t have to think about them. They will have the ability to automatically kick in when you need them. Unless you take the time (YES I SAID TAKE) to do this you will be like someone blindfolding themselves and stopping up their ears before choosing between two barrels to stick their hand into. One of the barrels, which will be nearest to you, is filled with venomous vipers and the other contains the keys to one of life’s greatest treasures. You’ll just keep choosing the nearest, most available and assessable barrel where you will consistently get bitten. Why not take the time to choose you first instead?